Defeating self sabotage: How to get back up after a hard fall


For the past 3 months, I’ve been trying to get started with prep for the 2017 competition season. However, for some reason, I couldn’t figure out why it’s taken me longer than normal to get into it and a find a connection with it. As most athletes know, bodybuilding competitions are a mental game and if you are not mentally prepared nor tied to your competition prep you might as well kiss it good-bye. The mental struggles endured is what either keeps athletes moving forward or keeps them from reaching the stage.

With all this in mind, I set out to figure out what it is that’s holding me back from getting my shit together. For that, I turned to my significant other and trainer along with a lot of soul searching in order to get my mind right.

The past three months a lot of dynamics have changed. From the household, to relationships, to professional careers, they have completely undergone a makeover and I am in the process of learning to adjust. In adjusting to this change, I’m trying to be everything to everyone but I’m forgetting to be everything to someone…myself.

I’m simultaneously trying to put my best foot forward in my profession, trying to take care of the house and the fur family, trying to be a great girlfriend, and keep everything moving with 2 a.m. cardio sessions and early morning weight training. By the end of it all I’m just getting downright exhausted leaving little room to become mentally strong and focused which means leaving little room for myself. I have a tendency to put all this pressure on myself and right now I’m buckling underneath all of that.

As Coach Dylan reminded me, I know what it took to turn Pro and reach that next level.  I know what state of mind I have to be in, in order to achieve that. In knowing this, I expect nothing less than what I brought to USA’s in Las Vegas. I expect so much of myself which is a good thing. However, when it turns negative is when all that stress and weight on my shoulders turns into a self-defeating thought process. Basically, self-sabotage.

The way I’m handling stress right now while being everything to everyone is self-sabotaging my goals, my dreams, and everything I hope to accomplish and become.

Where’s the silver lining?

I believe that it’s recognizing my problems now and realizing what I’m doing to myself, at this very moment. The silver lining is in being able to take action towards positive growth and creating a positive mind for what’s to come.

This past weekend I spent time reading and journaling in order to set my mind right and get ready to start achieving goals instead of beating myself up. Not only that, I asked for help. But realize when you ask for help, help will be given by those who love you because they truly want you to succeed too. And when all that is said and done, keep moving forward, keep putting one foot in front of the other making daily progress.

And remember mental toughness is all things.

“Mental toughness is many things.  It is humility because it behooves all of us to remember that simplicity is the sign of greatness and meekness is the sign of true strength.  Mental toughness is spartanism with qualities of sacrifice, self-denial, dedication.  It is fearlessness, and it is love.”

– Vince Lombardi